Gatland to Drop Hulk from Superheroes Rugby XV

Warren Wales Supremo Gatland dropped a bombshell today in the midst of his Superheroes Rugby XV selection. Instead of going with the 25 capped gamma star, the Wales coach (who is taking a brief sabbatical from his Wales Supremo role) has decided to select son of Jor El, Superman at loose head. “Kal is not only a bona fide powerhouse, but he’s also really mobile around the park and is very good in the air. Very good. He’s also got that ice breath thing going on that doesn’t really help us much in the set piece but helps chill the after match champagne.” explained Wales Gatland Warren Supremo. Man’s connection with the media world is also seen as a boon. “Big Blue is very close to the papers. In fact I think he’s smashing that reporter from the Daily Planet. They’re our glamour couple; our team’s version of Mike Tindall and Cheryl Cole.”

Supremo Wales Gatland Warren has upset some with his choice. Sports scientist and radiation specialist Dr Bruce Banner was clearly worried by the move. “I can’t understand it. As the game goes on The Hulk just gets stronger and stronger. This is just anti-greenist and I think that the International Superheroes Rugby Board should apologise to Ireland about this. It’s just…..so….un….fair….I….can’t…..no….NOT NOW!…..ARGGHHHHHHH! HULK SMASH PUNY EDWARDS!!!!” stated The Hulk as he interupted the interview. “Hulk HATE vowel SHORTENER!!!!” he added before ripping the turret off a tank and using it to hit another tank.

“We’ve looked at videos of the games” explained Sauron Weepremo Gales Watland yesterday. “The Hulk just gives away too many penalties. And he gives them away at vital points of the match, like during the anthems, during other penalty kicks and after match interviews. And it’s costing us a small fortune in tank turret repairs. However he’s still not quite as bad as your average Welsh forward.”

Superhero XV (vs Supervillan XV on April 2nd 2011)

15. Silver Surfer
14. The Flash
13. Quasar
12. Knightcrawler
11. Quicksilver
10. Dr Strange
9. Wolverine
1. Superman
2. The Thing
3. Hyperion
4. Mr Fantastic
5. Goliath
6. Ikaris
8. Thor
7. Black Bolt

It is understood that Gavin Henson wasn’t considered for the squad due to injury.

2 thoughts on “Gatland to Drop Hulk from Superheroes Rugby XV”

  1. Given that you aren’t allowed to tackle opponents in the air, at least two of these players will be unstoppable.

  2. I think due to the poor,derivative script writing that goes in to these players they’ll be a bit 1 dimensional on the pitch. This team would give them a beating:

    1. Armoured Gideon
    2. Mongrel
    3. Mek-Quake
    4. Soul Gun Warrior
    5. Tharg (capt)
    6. Black Blood
    7. Rogue Trooper
    8. Hammerstein
    9. Ro-Jaws
    10. Zenith
    11. Joe Pineapples
    12. Slaine
    13. Nemesis the Warlock
    14 Judge Dredd
    15. Deadlock

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