Disgraced Harlequins wing-cum- wannabe vampire, Tom Williams, has claimed the un- coveted “Wales On Sunday Welsh, Welshman of the Year Award 2009.” The Idris Elba Award, which is handed out annually by the ‘paper’ to anyone with a tangential Welsh link, is usually left until the end of the calendar year. This year is different though with Williams 8 month impact being so impactful. That’s a word. Look it up.
“Williams has done more to raise the awareness of Wales since that guy who hacked off his own balls, or perhaps the bloke in Pontyberem who had sex with a lamppost.” Stated WoS Welsh Exiles Editor, Dave Shallow. “Wherever you are, in Llandaff, The Cayo, Cathedral Road, or a corner of Clwb Ifor Bach, everyone’s talking about Haemoglobingate” brayed Shallow loudly into a mobile.
Shallow was optimistic that, unlike Williams, the story will run and run. “Wales’ profile has now gone sky high. All we have to do is remind people of Williams’ Welsh links. We’re thinking of getting Kylie Minogue to hand out the award. Or failing that, perhaps she’s got a second cousin somewhere in the Merthyr. If all else fails, I’ve got Stuart Cable’s fax number somewhere.”