In a historic move, Wales and England have decided to join forces and follow their political, legal, cricketial and financial union by forming a joint Wales England team for next year’s Six Nations. The team is to be called different names during alternate games. Their first game will be under the title Waland which will play in an all white kit. The following week, Engles will play in all red.
Those in the game on either side of Offa’s Wall spoke positively about the move. “This is great news. Finally England players who aren’t Johnny Wilkinson can know what it feels like to play in a Grand Slam winning side. It’ll also give teams other than Leicester a chance to challenge something legally for a change” said Leicester team manager, Peter Wheeler. Phil Bennett, former Llanelli, Wales, British Lions and anyone else who played in red with white shorts outside half gave an impassioned speech. “Look what these heroes have done to Wales. They’ve bought our coal, our water and our steel. They pay good money for our houses and they only live in them for a fortnight every 12 months, thereby guaranteeing that they contribute poll tax but don’t constitute a drain on valuable local resources. What have they given us? Well, the M4. Lovejoy. Danny Dyer. The actual game of rugby itself. Optical fibres. The Good Life. Oh, Mr Porter. Although I think that was set in Ireland. We’ve been embraced, loved, guided and encouraged by the English – and that’s who we are playing with next February, Gar.” ‘Expert’ analyist Jonathan ‘Jonathan’ Davies is also excited. “NUMBERS!” he screeched yesterday at a frequency only bats can hear.
Home games are to be played at the Majeski Stadium. Hell, everything else is. The IRFU are angry with the RWFRUU team as they felt that they were going to form closer links with Wales. “We share a shit league, a common heritage to the Left of England as well as a strong mutual dislike when you barely scratch the surface” argued head of the IRFU Shillally Mc O’Doughnal in between a pint and a whiskey chaser, yesterday.